S1E44 · Jess Ryan: Choose Your Life Don't Settle For It

Hey superstars welcome to the Virtus Performance Podcast. This is a new episode I'm not sure which week it is so I'm just gonna say it's a new episode for all you guys have been listening for the last 40 odd weeks thank you very much for all of your support all of your feedback please keep it up if it's a Facebook message or an Instagram message or an email let me know what you think what you like things like that I'm getting ever closer to my goal of hitting 52 weeks in a row and I'm still

not quite sure what I'm gonna do next whether I keep this going in the same format whether I change the format whether I do 10 episodes at a time based around something certain something specific I'm not sure so if you've got ideas you've got suggestions please throw them my way if you do enjoy it please send it to your friends and family please help us grow our community of listeners and people that are continuously getting better if you're not enjoying it please send it to people you don't like because then they can not enjoy it

as well and you know we all win I guess today I have Jess Ryan on the podcast Jess is a former intern a someone who calls me up and cries on the phone for extended period of time someone who consistently makes me be better she's a star from Roberta she's helping me grow the business helping us grow our business she's a coach she's a lifelong learner and someone who I learned something off every time I see her I have a meeting with her or she kicks my butt for not doing something I said I would

do so she's a very cool individual and I'm really excited for this chat I hope you guys enjoy it just as much as I do my personal and business goal is to be just a little bit better every day I believe everyone especially normal people have a story to tell the vertice podcast exists to help us all find small ways of consistent improvement by discussing the journey and experiences of each of our guests so Thursday it's a barmy 22 degrees out and I'm sitting here with my good friend Jess Ryan Jess welcome to the podcast

thank you thanks for having me an absolute pleasure first question for you what gets you out of bed in the morning lots good what time do you get out of bed in the morning 445 it's early it is yes it is early it's good though it's very good why do you want to get out of bed at 445 every morning well I'm on boot camp so I have to okay but I like I like getting up early because so many people get up at 8 a.m. or whatever and I've already accomplished so much by that

time so if I get up if I get up late I feel like I've just wasted time yeah is it always easy to get up at that time no because I like I constantly get it like I've been trying to get up at 5 a.m. every morning and it's working really really well because that's my rule now that's what I stick to and you've been doing this for a lot longer than I have but I'm sure you get it the same as I do oh it's okay it's easy for you just a morning person right

what do you what do you what's your thought process when someone says that to you so I I used to get really frustrated I just get really frustrated when people would say that because it's not it's not an easy thing to do and yes it's a habit that I've adopted now so it is easier yeah than what it used to be when I wasn't used to waking up anywhere near that time I used to sleep in all the time I used to you know sleep through all my alarms I used to wake up it I

then I woke up at seven then I woke up at six then I woke up at five now I wake up at 445 and it's not as much of a struggle as it used to be you're 30 minutes ahead of me every morning so brother but um but yeah other people saying that it's easy I guess they yeah they don't know that it it never used to be easy it's just easier now but some days it's not some days it's still a struggle but you just do it but the fact that you have to do

it because you told yourself you're gonna do it is that what kind of gets you out of bed even the days you don't want to yeah because I oh because I told because I told myself I have to it was a new standard that I wanted to have and I know that me getting up at that time helps me get to where I want to be yeah is why I do it because if I if I sleep in I don't feel as good as the days when I get up and get it done yeah awesome like why did you start to set the standard of waking up at 5 a.m.

because I felt as though I was missing an opportunity to grow and be better and I am someone that I'm the last thing from a morning person like you asked mom what it was like getting me out of bed when I was like in you seven to ten and it was a battle is the word she uses to describe it and I am part of me still that person that wants to sleep in and I still have those days where I sleep in and oversleep and they go whatever like I've just wasted four or five

hours or six hours or whatever but now it's I have the responsibility I feel I feel responsibility on a number of different number of different levels I feel a responsibility to myself to be a role model to the people around me because that allows me to hold my own standards might myself to my own standards repeatedly yes I'm gonna fuck up like all the time but that those fuck-ups don't find me well how I respond to the next day defines me so if I do sleep into 515 or 530 which to be honest hasn't happened like because it's my new standard my 458 alarm means I'm up my feet it hit the ground before 5 a.m.

and like I've got 45 minutes that I didn't have before our first session of Virtus to make myself better and usually it's do I fuel myself for the day do I have a coffee do I read a book do I meditate and most mornings if I do get to work by 515 I get to do all of those things so automatically I'm winning the day and I'm ticking the boxes and it's before 6 a.m. and it's before 6 a.m. when everyone else is asleep and like I I don't like the ideal that you're like you're

competing against everyone hmm because you're competing against yourself but I also like the ideal you competing against everyone because if everyone else is asleep and you're doing putting in the extra extra work and hard yards then you're gonna be ahead of where they want where they are yeah and you're gonna get to where you want to be quicker where is it that you're going where do you want to be big question I know it's a big question are we talking in a year's time in five years time in ten years time well let's let's link

that that big question back to my first initial question and why do you get out of bed in the morning for such why do you do what you do I like I like I guess I my main my main overarching theme for what it is that I'm doing yeah at the moment is helping Oh goes in line with Brutus but helping other people be better yeah which helps me be better and across everything that I'm doing right now that's the theme I guess bringing out the best in other people and trying to help them reach

their potential so you're a true coach in that aspect yeah I guess which I'm not even doing that much for those are listening Jess isn't just at vertice I'm sure you read in the bio and seeing this that she's a coach and she's helping with helping she's driving a lot of the operations process stuff at vertice at the moment but what else are you doing what else you're spending here 168 hours doing a lot now so I'm at vertice and I help one of my good friends run a boot camp in the city and I'm

currently working at Monash aquatic and recreation center as well and then the usual trying to balance family social sleep training all of that so you're trying to do life with three jobs yeah what's the what does that look like going forward because obviously I think you're the kind of person it's always gonna be helping people but what that looks like might not necessarily be in your regular roles look like going for so moving forward I'm not hopefully all my people don't listen to this podcast yeah it won't be out for like six weeks oh yeah

I'm not particularly like Monash I'm using in the interim to learn new skills to ensure a bit of a mainstream and yeah ideally I'd like to be at vertice full-time and then keeping boot camp as well because I get a lot out of both of them they're both really good environments and both feed my values so vertice I'd be looking at doing a mixture of coaching operational work kind of business admin sort of stuff driving the growth driving a business so that we can help more people right like that's what it all keeps coming back

to yeah that's the mission awesome yeah that's everything yeah and that's something that we're working on always together yeah good how did you get involved in this in the first place because I like obviously I know the story but for those who don't know you very well I don't know us and don't know how you got started well talk me through the process of you applying for our internship and ticking those boxes yeah I was an intern that was a long time ago a year ago it was only 12 months ago you know one year

anniversary we did it was magical I got I had never even heard of it it's because I'm not from anywhere around this area I need to talk to my branding department marketing department make sure that we're growing our mission more than we are now good but I went to uni with Campbell if any if any of you listeners know Campbell he was an intern and did the internship twice and I went because he just loved to play just a classic overachiever he's a an exceptional human he's but yeah so I went to uni with Campbell

he did the internship kept raving on about this place called Curtis and kept wearing the merch at uni and I was like this place seems like a cult and yeah he just kept saying to me you have to go there you'll love it like you'll love the place you have to go there so I'd organized to meet up with you to chat about the internship and had set up a meeting and then the morning of the meeting typed it into maps because I thought the place was in more dialic and I was like oh yeah

that's fine I used to go where we living in time living in Knoxfield which is like near Frantrigale okay so the area for those that aren't Melbourne residents what half an hour from more dialic yeah like 40 minute Oh half an hour from more dialic yeah a lot longer from Mornington so more dialic seemed fine and then typed it into maps on the morning of meeting you guys and I was like holy crap it's in Mornington there's no chance in hell I'm doing an internship in Mornington like I'm just not coming down there three times

a week that's ridiculous and then yet meet you guys came to vertice fell in love with it straightaway got so much value from you guys from the first half an hour of meeting you this coach cam and I interviewing you right coach cam underscore yeah yeah I just loved it the banter the energy the vibe everything that you guys stood for and then left there being like well guess I'm driving tomorrow what what was your first impression of this because I'm always interested I get I guess head in the sand kind of in the stuck

in the bubble knowing what I wanted to be and what I experienced it to be but it's really interesting to hear everyone else's opinion first up I'll initially I walked in and and it was just a really cool setup really liked the look of the place it wasn't at a time when VGT was on or heaps of people were there when I initially walked in but how the playfulness and just fun cheeky banter that you and cam both had with each other just made it seem like a really good environment a really good place to

be and you were human and you weren't trying to sell me anything or you were just fun but then at the same time you were really professional and your standards around your coaching and the knowledge that you had in actually teaching people how to move and then teaching them to move well and then how you progress people here so it's not just a smash sesh when you come in and it's not about losing body fat and the next fad or the next diet or whatever it's actually about being healthy and moving well and learning how

to you know what healthy is yeah and I guess like something that we and that's awesome that we together feedback because that's what we were trying what we are trying to build is that realization that training is such a small part of the puzzle that if you don't have life sorted then trainings not going to matter and I think for us we want to we wanted to and continually continuing to want to create an environment where people just want to be yeah and then the training the nutrition the parties all the mindfulness stuff that comes

after if someone wants to be in the space and wants to spend time in the space and wants to continually work on themselves in that space then all the other stuff comes that's awesome that's good feedback yeah that's cool that's good you guys are alright yeah I guess so talk to me we'll go back a little bit first talk to me about why you decided to an exercise degree what was what fact is growing up a fourth of moved you to that path okay so growing up I was always into sport I guess a lot

of people go through high school they're really into sport they don't know what they're gonna do after high school so they'll they decide to do sports science that was me that was a lot of our staff and most of our interns so I guess if you're a exercise science student or thinking about doing being an exercise science student it's an awesome degree if you're not really sure what you want because you get a little bit of a lot a little bit about a lot hmm but it's been called the arts degree of it's been called

the arts degree of sport because you don't necessarily have a lockdown career path afterwards and I guess we see you you guys would be the same a lot of the guys that graduate with you tend to go to teaching and and things like that rather than me yeah or EP or something like that so it is a hard one if you're for four years I looked at it as oh shit I don't have a job idea at the end of this when I finished I was like like maybe six months later I was like how

does this I can kind of pick out of whatever I want and I think the biggest suggestion that we've made for interns and we're able to say you do it during you while you're at uni is start applying what you're doing yeah at uni these guys are any uni students in any degree but apply what you do if you don't know what you love you don't know where you want to be try shit hmm yeah you and fail yeah and fail over and over again yeah just keep failing you'll realize what you want to do

by doing the shit you hate more than by doing the stuff you love hmm like Greg mentioned in our meeting today I'm like why do you do all you do is like so don't have to get a real job yeah I think I think we can all it's up we can all share that sentiment right yeah so growing up sport into exercise science yeah yeah so I finished high school and I was working in hospitality I've always been work driven so it's just work work work and then tried out a couple of courses started going

to gym loved going to gym and I was like I think I'm pretty good at this and a couple of people around me were saying you should do a PT course so ended up doing a PT course loved that wanted more knowledge applied for exercise and sport science we're traveling a fair bit made his stupid decisions and you know stuffed around a little bit with my education but then got serious about it and and yeah ended up doing their degree and working at the same time and one of the one of the jobs you had

while you were doing your exercise degree so I I was working at a gym in administration management and coaching yeah so one-on-one or group stuff and then went to another smaller studio that did a lot of eight-week challenges and kind of comp comp girls and things like that yeah and then worked at council gym I've kind of had all the above then worked at winning which was admin and finance in operations and then and here we are so you've had a good crack at a big chunk of the industry yeah yeah what what are the

areas of the industry that you see the most need for improvement anywhere that's not this isn't intentionally an alphabetis but obviously I just as someone that believes wholeheartedly in what we do so yeah every time she says things like that I'll tell her to stop and genuinely think about the answer yeah so it's um well I don't it's not just a coincidence that I choose to drive for an hour a day down here like there's not many places this isn't just a plug but there's not that many places like this in the industry so yeah

you know um and it's cool to have start like you as a staff member to drive down three four days a week an hour each way sometimes battling like pick our traffic to be here yeah and it's nine to ten hours out of my week that I'm just traveling yeah to come to which is like which when someone who doesn't have a lot of spare time that's a lot of your week but you want to do it right yeah and I guess like we look at some of our clients we've got people driving from the

city from a chukka from warren ponds from gibbsland we've got people driving from everywhere to be at this place and I think it's that's reason enough to celebrate and then we've got a real responsibility to make sure we actually do that yeah we just need to get to lunch get in the ferry over from Tasmania yeah that would be a big one shout out to the lounge when she's finally since this what was it so obviously you've worked in the fitness industry what was it like working at winning by what is winning for those that

don't know what kind of business is it and what was it like being in that environment incredible in terms of growth and personal development you couldn't you couldn't ask for more it's a so my previous job was a business that coaches up coaches if it's other business coaches or other personal trainers or gym owners or you know massage therapists with their own business or people starting out or you know any sort of I guess someone who coaches other people to be better in any industry so working in that was a rude shock to start with

because I wasn't used to being in such an intense environment of radical transparency and honesty and calling people out and constantly pushing the standard to be better and not accepting any excuses for why things aren't done it's just extreme ownership and yet and not in a way of constantly you know this is negative this can be better all of that but having the okay what work what didn't work what can we improve and having the extreme gratitude and thankfulness for where we are and how you know the day-to-day things that we're all doing to support

each other it was just a rude shock because not many places are like that yeah so in terms of growth and personal development it was huge but yeah but it was just it's not the industry that I want to our coaching is but yeah it was very full-on for me and I struggled for a really long time in terms of the hours and intensity and sort of hustle yeah it was a role that I was really really struggling with I had an awesome mentor that church we love it my church shout out hold on shout

out belt shout out to my church it was a massive help through that but yeah he I just really struggled in I had it I had a really big workload and you want to just start winning at that stage right yeah I was at uni full-time at the same time trying to finish uni and I think for three months of that you're a vertice doing you don't you so you're someone that tends to put a little bit too much on their plate yeah or too much or is it positive pressure for you to allow yourself

to put that pressure on yourself to get stuff done well it was really good like I work well under pressure most of the time it was it was a lot for me to handle but it taught me how to reach out for help a lot in a few long conversations you know some tears mostly tears mostly tears but it was really good because I you know if if times get hard now I'm like okay well I got through that yeah if I can get through that I can get through anything yeah not that it not

that it was bad it was just it was a growth yeah like and I found out last night this is a little sidebar I found out last night that Tommy T's putting together a drinking game for this podcast so when I say things like cool cool or when I read reassess a quote he has to drink or things like that so rather than not doing those things I'm just gonna say it over and over again so he gets like he gets a little plastered shout out to Tommy T but I don't condone binge drinking at

all like not at all we do condone Tommy T in like high amounts I binge on Tommy T but one of my one of the favorite quotes lately is growth is never pleasant at the time so whenever we are working towards something and whether whenever we're going through a struggle that then the understanding that this hurts but it's a good hurt and we're working towards something is something that everyone should be able to accept and kind of I use it as a bit of fuel right like if I'm having a really hard time a really

hard day I really remember that and you know one of like my background on my phone is some of these days have been the hardest days of my life but I'm but I can also simultaneously feel the indescribable personal development I'm going through and like that's like that's life right if the people that want to grow and achieve and have success whatever that is to them if you need to be going through hard times you need to be struggling you need to be working towards it yeah what apart from the need to ask for help

and reach out what are the other things that that ten month period taught you so much one of the massive things was was just don't make excuses for things you know everything every single part of your life is your choice you know yes situations happen like I think it's one of one of the things that even Tony Robbins says you know talking about the Twin Towers like yes things like that happen and things happen that aren't in our control all the time but some people when the Twin Towers were affected took it as this big

negative thing and then we're stuck in in such a huge I don't know negative mindset about terrorism and how terrible everything in the world is and all of that yeah and then other people took it as yes it was a terrible thing that happened but how how much gratitude can we have for all the people around us or you know all the firefighters that went and saved all these people's lives like look at how awesome it is that we can bring people together after such a big tragedy and it's not like those people were standing

on the gratitude Street other people were standing on the negativity Street like that's really interesting because I think I think it's Sebastian Jungers books tribe tribe it he talks about that war tends to be the happiest time for a lot of people and after events like September 11 he is adding example his book I'm pretty sure that people are overwhelmingly happier because they're more appreciative of what they do have because they realize how quickly it can be taken away yeah right like as soon as like comfort is one of the worst things for progress because

you forget what you're working for and that struggle is so important and the way you like it's that you know life is 90% of 10% what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it right now if you see if a dog goes into a if a happy dog goes into a room full of mirrors he's just gonna see hundreds of happy dogs flying back at him right and he's gonna be happy if a sad dog or a grumpy dog goes into a room full of mirrors you can see 100 grumpy angry dogs

looking back at him and he's gonna have a shit day so as soon as you're well that's like a metaphor for life yeah well that's exactly I'm happy generally that'll breed other yeah happiness in others because energy feeds off energy one yeah one of the things I was reading the other day was if you see one asshole yes I think Jamie Smith posted it yeah if you see my asshole they're the asshole if you see if you tend to see assholes all day then maybe like and you can look at that as well don't be

an asshole you can look at it well everything you put out that's what the world's gonna get back to you yeah and I think if you put out hard work then it's gonna get back to you and you see that like in like everyone listening just think of the people who you hold in the highest regard think of the people that you look up to the most think of the people who are genuinely killing it and what they're doing they're probably the most grateful most most socially brilliant uplifting people around and there's a good chance

that they work incredibly hard at that like yeah they're those overnight successes that take 20 30 40 50 years to become successful they're the people that keep tipping in day in day out they're the people that keep coming back to the well and realizing yep this is a marathon this is not a sprint mmm and I think I was able to I learned a heap off you last year while you were doing that kind of crazy period of your life where you were trying to do a million things at once whether it be trying to

tell you to pull your head head in when you're crying over something stupid where whether you're whether it was just talking you about what you're learning and winning that day or whatever it whatever it was those times you're able to see how quickly you were growing and you helped everyone around you grow quicker and I think that ability to see that hard time and learn from it and know that it's not gonna last forever is what allows you to get where you want to get to but it's cool because even that was a choice yeah

like in that time to see it as I'm grateful for this struggle like and cut and really feel it and not just sit there and be like oh yeah I'm grateful for this like actually I'm I'm really grateful that I'm going through a hard time at the moment because it's teaching me discipline it's teaching me consistency it's teaching me this this this this all these things that I'm learning and these skills that I'm currently developing in having this hard time so actually being really present and grateful for you know hard times because you learned so

much yeah from them like if if life was just easy all the time one how boring like you wouldn't get those learnings hmm yeah and like you we wanted we like I like almost I got a theory I've been kind of working on the last couple days there should never be such thing as a bad day hmm because even if something like a twin towers happens or someone passed away or whatever it's like yes those things are horrible things in there in that thing happening that's a horrible thing but how you react to it is

going to determine how you feel the next day and the next day and the people that struggle to find positivity enjoy and and happiness regularly are the ones that look at something happening and go to all that shit and bitch about it for the next four hours yeah like even if something bad does happen it's still the whole rest of the day or the whole morning beforehand where you can find gratitude in little things and great yeah physio yeah sorry shadow talks about it a lot but it's finding what was the last time you're happy

and building banks of a bank of happy memories like that to come back to mmm because if you've got that bank full of happy memories and when you're having a shit time over and over again then you can keep pulling from that Bank and then eventually that that'll put you in a position to be able to start depositing back into the bank and refilling it and being strong yeah and the bigger you you can make your bank when things are all good when that horrible thing happens like when if someone passed away or whatever it

is devastating but and feel that like be sad be angry let yourself feel all of whatever you want to feel it's okay to feel that but then if you if you have all of those happy things or you know things that you really grateful for like if if something terrible happened tomorrow I still have my health I still have a roof over my head I still have access to clean drinking water I still have a massive support system that I've built up for myself like yeah I've got a car we have all these things we

live in Melbourne yeah we live in a very lucky part of the world I like on perspective it's it's something we could bang on about all day yeah but it's just how you respond to that that initial thing yesterday I had my immunizations for South America right 500 bucks cost took me three hours of my time 500 bucks and I was like I had like a five-minute period I was like I can't believe I'm spending that much and then I went you know what we live in a time we live in a place where I

can spend $500 and not die yeah and nothing and not have typhoid and not have get hepatitis and hopefully not get malaria and thanks to the trouble doctor for giving me some really good advice and try not to get bitten by mosquitoes thank you man I appreciate that I'll try not to anyway but but like if we if we can and this is something I'm like I'm only getting good at because I work on it every day like the importance of gratitude but like how lucky are we to live in a time where I can

spend 500 bucks on that yeah and but that's just a mindset thing for me I'm also able to spend my money on flights to South America I'm able to have equipment things that allow me to hike some red mountains and and do some cool stuff and and unfortunately chat Tommy T again he told me that the immunizations don't immunize me against bad decisions so I can't still can't jump off big things and do stuff without getting hurt which I'm really upset about because I thought it stopped me from having all those bad things anyway I

don't understand how immunizations work obviously basically all right we went off track over there not that we really have a track right question I want to ask you is around personal development what like you're someone that is very introspective and you're very reflective on what works and what doesn't and even if you're you know ball of tears for two hours like and I really respect you for this you're someone that is able to use like feel the way you want to feel cry for that period of time you need to cry for and then go

you know what let's unpack this why am I feeling like that what are the things that have allowed you to get to that point because I feel as though self-reflection is a journey that people need to dive into and then keep chipping away at what's allowed you to get to that point where you can do that and again you're still on the process yeah you haven't clocked it yet I don't think anything really everything's untrue but everything could be better it takes it takes a long time and it takes work so it doesn't you know

there was a time that probably wasn't that long ago where I would just cry and be down in the dumps for a day or a week or whatever and that's not that doesn't serve me that doesn't help me you know you just say down the dumps so I guess from that extreme and then coming out of that you know on the other side that's the thing right you're never on one side of the other like you're always on the line and being able to discern whether you're on the sad side or the happy side yeah

and you can choose like you you can choose so I can make the choice to be down in the dumps for a week which doesn't serve me or I can choose to in that moment like the other day sat in the car for 40 minutes and was bawling my eyes out yeah didn't know why like in that moment and could not start I was uncontrollably crying and then I was like okay I can either sit here and continue to just cry which is an option or I can just let it all out and really think

about why am I upset like what is it that's currently making upset what am I actually feeling because I can I can be sad or whatever but if I just sit there and think oh I'm really sad I'm really upset that still doesn't help me solve a problem or feel better so okay specifically like unpack it what specifically am I upset about okay you know because you in that state you'll you're likely to be overwhelmed and think everything sucks like this is the worst day ever and use all of this big language yeah of everything

in the world right now sucks yeah what what's hot why but if I just come to you and say everything in my life is hard one that's probably not the case and two that doesn't help me fix it so if I can unpack it and say okay what specifically am I upset about it's mum said something before okay great can I go and speak to my mum about that yes okay is it my education no education is going well right now awesome is it work oh work I'm a little bit stressed about this this and

this yeah who specifically can I speak to about that to help well so what was your process the other day going working through that because you ended the day in a much more content and happy I don't know you weren't happy but you were happy in a happier position than you were at the start of the day so what was the process you went through so I said it wasn't a flicking a switch process right no not at all so I one just cried it out so let let all the emotions happen and then two

we have in our staff page a little huddle group so I guess reached out to those people around me which is our work and work crew we've got a really good supportive environment so easy to enlist the help of your allies the people that want to see you succeed yeah good so you know how to chat and just put it out there of how I was feeling and what specifically I was you know that was getting to me put that out there which helped me to identify and articulate what the problem actually was and then

just came into work and still did the thing so that was one of the biggest things was because I'm working on consistency and discipline right now if I'm having a bad hour or whatever that doesn't stop the little things that you can still tick the box and still succeed in that day yeah so I still came to work I still trained I still drank three litres of water I still ate nutritious food you showed up and held yourself to the standards you'd set yeah yeah otherwise I would have just felt worse and I would have

fully failed the day so yeah I think and just enlist in the support around you and still do still keep routine like still do the things you would normally do because it makes you feel better yeah and when you can break it down like that you allow yourself to understand well you know what 80% of what I was upset about was this one little thing that when you identify it ceases to become a big problem and it ceases and it becomes something that you can just go okay these are the three steps I need to

take to do this and it might be talking to someone it might be writing something down it might be talking to talking to yourself yeah and I think that what we've kind of implemented as a team and I've started implementing it in the Virtus family is and you don't actually have to talk to anyone that's kind of the if you don't want to talk to anyone you don't have to talk to anyone but we go live on our Facebook Facebook group and we just talk about we do it's called WBF it's cool like what's going

on your world what do you focus on what you blocked on and it allows you to unpack stuff in your head and whether you want whether like everyone's gonna be different but whether you guys want to write it down whether you want to do the video whether you want to talk someone go through that process what's working in the moment because if you focus on shit that's not working then you're gonna focus on stuff it's not working all the time but if you focus on what is working there's a win yeah and then what's your

focus today well my focus is to fix this because I'm blocked on this and yeah it doesn't it just becomes a process you go through rather than everything's too hard life sucks yeah or yeah because then you cease to become the victim hmm and when you cease to become the victim it's you take charge of everything that happens to you yeah it's like extreme ownership that we talk about all the time and you know if you haven't read Jocko Willings book read it because it's game changer but it's whatever happens is because of me if

something positive happens if someone reacts positively then it's because of me if someone reacts and reacts never negatively or doesn't do something that I asked of them then I need to reframe it better and that's what you I've seen you work on really well and what us as a team are working on is that ability to own it and be transparent with each other I think with that as well like if you're a victim of what's happening to you in your environment it's it's not empowering and you can't change that so if I if my

belief as a human is everything I have a choice over and I can I can control how I react and you know lucky saying something mean to me if I get upset about that that's my choice to feel upset about what lucky said so you know things like that if you if your belief is I have a choice it's empowering and it's just you actually do have a choice whereas if I'm just a victim like you can't change anything you can't change your position or as if you have a choice about everything you can change

anything in your life yeah 100% and how important for you has been surrounding yourself with the right people like that yeah massively so big thing for me like I love my family absolutely love them my mom's awesome my brother's awesome like my niece lover but I can't live with them I'm sure a lot of people can relate and it's not it's not a bad thing it's just not an environment that I want to be in so I can't be the best version of me and still live at home because mom and my brother both have

completely different belief systems to me and they don't believe that everything is a choice and you know sometimes they do play the victim in a lot of things so I get very frustrated because I can see how adopting that mindset of everything is a choice yeah can help them so much yet they they choose not to help themselves so now that I've moved out of home and I surround myself with people who have similar values and who take ownership of their life and their decisions and their direction and all of that yeah and you know

coming down to Burtis and working at Burtis with people whose values align and working at boot camp with Geordie and you know surrounding myself with other people who are constantly trying to better themselves is massive rather than being surrounded by bitching and people who tear you down and snide remarks and all of that yeah bullshit stuff that you just don't need if it yeah if the people that are in your circle aren't jumping for joy every time you succeed you probably need a new circle yeah what it make your answer there's like this if anyone

has read allies where Malcolm Gladwell like there's different kinds of people in the world right there's connectors and if you want to put yourself in a any environment where it's constant growth you're in charge and it's your choice to find that environment some people build it some people join it but like you've sought out the people you want to be spending time with hmm and you've identified the people that you want to be spending time with but that don't necessarily serve your growth and your needs and it's just a matter of just saying between the

two and then going well you know what I'm gonna spend put more of my energy into this mmm what are the like I know you I'm gonna cut you off quickly because I don't want to say interestingly on that topic because I was a thing that I noticed back when I was out winning and no placement and at boot camp and doing all those things I was talking to my osteo Geordie who I work at boot camp with and I was saying how cool it was that I'm constantly surrounded by all these awesome people now

and I go to burn us and there's so many awesome people there and I'm at boot camp and there's so many awesome positive people there and I'm not winning and surrounded by all these incredible people and he said to me that's not a coincidence you're not just there's not just places in the world where all the awesome people like you know like you're because I'm becoming better I'm attracting more positive people so if if I'm more positive and more uplifting and all of that sort of stuff that's what I'm attracting so yeah you know yeah

like attracts like yeah and I thought it was so cool and I was just like oh yeah I haven't just stumbled into the only three awesome places yeah exactly but then like it shows how in charge of your own destiny or or a journey or yeah what like what steps you take today will determine wait where you go tomorrow where you go down the track and you'll find the same thing like you doing your business course and surrounding yourself with other people who are better than you and who but you know and are more developed

in those areas like go hang out with people who are better and it lifts you up but understanding and like in an understanding it's kind of twofold right like it's environmental put yourself in the environment where you know people are gonna help you succeed and they're gonna want you to succeed yeah and it caught it takes resources to do that right it takes you time it takes your money it takes your energy but if you're doing that and you're constantly growing and then next thing you know you're miles ahead of where you would have been

and miles ahead of people that didn't take that path yeah like one of my biggest fears is doing the same shit now that I'm doing in five years like I want to be I want to be a completely different person in terms of growth and improvement and things like that like I think my values and my vision will remain the same but it'll adapt and all grown it'll evolve yeah absolutely and I think that ability to figure out what you want out of life and out of what you're doing and have an intention like one

of the things business coaches bang on about all the time is is having intention for everything so we have a podcast you asked me inside this podcast what's your intention for today's podcast like what's our intention for today's training session what's our intention for today's meeting what's my intention for for dinner tonight like my intention with dinner tonight might be to have a really good conversation with KP Leroy and Tyler around the dinner table yeah if I go in with I don't have an intention good chance I'll just sit on my phone and won't talk

to him and and like that's not what I want like so this needs to be my intention so I think we try and we try and do so many different things at once because we want to tick all of the boxes but when you go what's my intention well my intention right now is just have a really cool conversation mmm is to hopefully put some some of our thoughts out into the world wide webs and have people learn from it like that's our intention for today's podcast and just have a really good conversation yeah yeah

it's as simple as that like when you and the process is cool we sit down we just have a chat I'm not worried about the outcome I'm not worried about how many people listen to it or how much feedback I get from it but if you aren't doing it please send me an email if you're not enjoying it please don't please send me an email and tell me why if you yeah tell your friends and family like keep keep like if you enjoying this stuff spread it out there because I want more people listen to

it but that's not my focus my focus is on our conversation now and being present now and I think when you know what you want you realize that well yeah I've got to work on where I'm headed but day-to-day is most important yeah what are you grateful for like what's the focus for the day what's not working because then you can go how do I get better hmm but it's very cool though because if you're if you're catching up for a friend if you kept floor I can't even speak if you're catching up with a

friend yeah and your intention is to add value to their life or to have a really good conversation or to become closer friends in that hour or whatever you know what's been happening each other's lives because as we get older the amount of time you can spend with each person diminishes right yeah and you're probably not gonna go see a movie for that yeah because you won't be speaking to them the whole time yeah so it is you know be there and actually be there don't be there on your phone distracted emailing texting at the

same time like if you're you know if you are working focus on the process focus on the input focus on the value that you can provide to whoever's in front of you in that moment don't focus on the outcome of whatever it may be because you just put so much pressure on it like focus on I'm gonna hang out with lucky today and we're gonna have an awesome conversation and whatever outcome of that yeah but yeah I've always been a big fan of like you do things for the right reasons the right thing will happen

yeah and I think if you are true to your values and beliefs and visions and everything will work itself out even if you have those hard struggle times that we talked about earlier on what are your values what are the things that you value most highly my health and fitness is big one for me yeah obviously I wouldn't be working in this industry a big one is honesty I just don't think I just don't think dishonesty ever serves anyone and that it's a hard thing to be hundred percent honest because it hurts right it hurts

and it's hard to sometimes be completely honest with yourself definitely if it is you know what actually I fucked up like don't make excuses for yourself just admitting that is hard sometimes being completely honest with other people like if someone oversteps a boundary of yours it's hard to say to someone in front of your face hey what you just did isn't cool like okay you know if that's how you want to speak yeah speak like that but I don't get spoken to like that and that's not rude it's just you putting out there what you're

okay and what you're not okay with and I feel like the ability to be able to do that is really important because otherwise I'd be hurt from a situation and and nothing changes but next time and the time after and the time after and that becomes normal yeah you can go whoa I'm not okay with that set your boundaries set your standards set the the bandwidth you want to be operating in then every conversation or interaction you have after that will all serve what you want and will serve the needs of each individual a part

of it and then everyone gets better everyone improves yeah I think yeah like for me and I'm like I know for you growth is kind of the most most important thing at the moment where it's just like we want to grow the business obviously we want to grow the perfect like us as professionals and as managers and operation people's in a business but that personal development is come first yeah yeah one of the one of the big kind of ideas that I like is if if you can't look after your own bedroom or your own

cleanliness don't tell someone to look after this like yes it's you have to be the person I uphold those standards and like I'm the first person to say that I don't have the cleanest bedroom but I'm working on it I'm mindful of it I'm aware of it so that when I say it and go fuck I need a clean up like but it's making time to go when's that important to me like tonight I'm going home after after work and I'm gonna spend an hour clean because I'm not okay with those standards that I've been

I'm not okay with the what I've been keeping which is not up to my standards yeah it's just prioritizing yeah cuz today that might really be important to you but yesterday like having a really good night with KP or something like that yeah might have been more of a priority than you having a clean room you're putting you know your relationship before the cleanliness of your environment yeah at that point in time but that's why but that's my choice the problem where a lot of people get is they try and fix everything at once but

one thing we realize is well if you if your training and money are the two issues that us you're struggling with the most at the moment then you getting on top of your training or help you sort out your money and you sorting any money will help you sort out your environment and all those other things and then next thing you know you're six months down the track and you haven't felt like you've made a change but you look back at where you were when you set those goals or when you wrote those things down

you weren't happy about and you've kicked them all off because you invested in the process and focus on the process yeah another quote Tommy T drink up he sent me the list and he doesn't want me to say pull the trigger pull the trigger pull the trigger he doesn't want me say play on he doesn't want to smoke me say yeah good or good from you he doesn't want to hear bottles or anything he doesn't want to hear that's amazing he doesn't want to hear me quoting things I was very demanding I know I don't

know if he doesn't want to hear it but I think when he does hear it he was gonna have it from me drink it a lot lucky mentions of podcast he was listening to I've ever seen a lot of Joe Rogan podcast lately and a lot of Tim Ferriss podcast lately and a lot of events fit and podcast lately true where do you see your the most growth coming for you in the next two or three years good question I'm aware it's a hard question because I would struggle to answer it yeah one of my

big focuses is communication so the I feel like the better I can get at my communication and learning how to communicate with other people better and more efficiently or more effectively you know Greg was asking the other day like what's the point of communication and it's the hard thing to answer but it's so if you can do it effectively remember the answer you get hot with some feel philosophical King Greg it was magical I think it's something on the lines of communication should be to a juice to bring out learning or a change in behavior

yeah because most people think communication well it's just me telling someone something it's just talking well it's verbal nonverbal there's so many different ways of communication yeah I really like that mm-hmm yeah and what are the resources to improve that communication because I think a lot of people get stuck in I want to improve this shit how do I do it yeah or actually doing it yeah rather than just saying yeah difference between knowledge and knowing knowledge is understanding the theory behind something and knowing is applying it practically and figuring out well fuck this doesn't

work or this works or this works better hmm what are the things that you do to make sure it's knowledge rather than knowing ask for help go to people who do the thing that you suck at all that you struggling at and hey how'd you do this yeah what habits what daily things do you do that makes you good in this area and do that like a model that behavior like go to people who are good at it already read books listen to podcasts do some research go do courses that teach you what you want

to learn and then try it and stuff it up if you have a conversation with someone and it doesn't go well after it think okay what what part of that did I stuff up but be okay like because that's what helps you learn and grow like if yeah we always want to find that a little bit of suck point yeah so there we go I'm good I'm good I'm good yeah suck cool there's my there's my limit now I'm gonna work through that and then you start point changes yeah that's a thing now I'm gonna

this up point sucker and like if you constantly if you constantly avoid the things you suck at you will always suck mmm and that suck point won't change hmm write that down we just need to move this up one further for exactly that life is just moving the suck point forward so get further I'm gonna write a blog post on the suck point yeah look like birth through the suck point by learning and things like that and it comes from I find that I can improve other areas certain areas of my life by focusing on

others so if I am struggling with my management skills at work and I'm not able to a juice learning from my staff like I would like to then maybe I need to read a book about about psychology or about about like how the human brain works or I need to learn something about neurology like I've like one of my goals this year is to read 52 books it was 30 some I've changed it because I've read a few already but goal is to read 52 books and I'm realizing that I'm reading things that aren't necessarily

directly related to what's going on like I'm not just reading management books yeah I'm reading life books I'm reading psychology books I'm reading psychotherapy books I'm reading like storybooks and reading books we have Buddhism like yeah and all of these things they only link into each other and it's just constant improvement and then when you open your mind I was having a conversation my sister the other day and she was talking about how and obviously everyone knows this already but how when you're in a positive mindset and a negative mindset you view the world differently

yeah right so I can't know what what it's called and I don't really have time to try and find it what it was actually called but she was saying that people will inherently and it's just like I'm gonna find it but people will change what they are learning and what they are viewing depending on how they're actually feeling yeah well everyone's map of the world is different so yeah like no one thinks like I think and no one thinks like you think but we all think that other people think like us so then when people

don't seem to get it yeah we get really frustrated but everyone thinks differently it's called the mula liar illusion and it suggests that sadder people don't actually visually process the world the same way happy people do right which we understand but the way we tend to look at things rather than big picture we look at things if we're sadder we look at things in like like micro thing like we look at the granular details of this sucks it sucks it sucks when we're happy we can look at things bigger picture and go all this struggle

is gonna help me get to get to where I want to get to and she sent me like a big thing about she's like I'm writing a paper on it like can you summarize it in 500 word blog post for me and send it to me and then and I was like I love that stuff and I want you to validate my cognitive biases and validate my opinions and she goes I want to challenge your opinions I'm like I want you to challenge my opinions because if if you prove to me or show to show

me that my opinions are invalid then my opinion changes and the way I view something and go well that's not right this is what I what I now think like anyone that gets like that's the I think that's the biggest part of self reflection is understand that if you don't know something then like learn it and if you do know something and you realize it to be wrong don't just be the person that buries your head in the sand and goes no I'm right like and and justify it till you're red in the face like

except I don't know I don't know you don't know what you don't know so if you can actually go okay I was wrong about that and then that's I don't know I find it incredible incredibly empowering to be able to go well there's all this shit I don't know sweet let's try and find out and I want like I think Beck asked me the same question what's something you want but you don't have right now and I'm like the answers to all my questions with that as well like in in being right or wrong like

sometimes it it actually doesn't matter who's right or who's wrong or if you're in the right or if you're in the wrong yeah it goes back to what's my intention from this so if you're having an argument with someone and pushing your point and pushing your need to be right yeah like you could both be right well you're missing the point right if that's your pure intention I want to be right well you're missing the point because yeah it should be well I want to know what's right and then I want that to become my

new my new bias when you opinion because then all that you focus on is growth and then that ego that's sitting around going I need to be right I need to be right I need to be right it ceases to become a factor because you're constantly chasing what is correct not what you think is correct and sometimes you're gonna be right sometimes you're gonna be wrong but and like as a I've realized that as a coach as a role model to some people as a brother sister friend you know team member a vertice like if

I don't know something then I want to find out and then that's putting people around you that are kicking goals in that area and seeing what they think and then formulating your own assumption on that and then everyone wins because you grow and move forward and things like that very cool yeah I have a bunch of questions to ask you these you can go deeper into this or you can be really short succinct first one you mentioned you've made a bunch of stupid decisions what's the stupidest decision you've ever made who stupidest decision I've ever

made people listening at home just think amongst yourselves what I just tries to think of an answer this question there's been I made a lot of I've made a lot of dumb choices but everyone has me I'm grateful that I've made them probably stupidest decision I've ever made it's honestly probably around alcohol consumption yeah like a lot of my youth was partying binge drinking that's all led to a lot of stupid decisions that have ended up in I don't know environments like that I looking back now who's not safe if I'm I don't know drunk at 4 a.m.

and stranded on Chapel Street or stupid things like that like which at the time you think is funny or whatever but in hindsight what was I doing yeah I was listening to Jordan Peterson's book the other day twelve rules of life and he's talking about drunk people and obviously it lowers our inhibitions right we all know that but the reason why we do stupid things while we're drunk we don't think about the consequences because alcohol does something to your brain where you cease to actually think that a future exists you don't think about what you

don't think about the consequences because in your like it's all about the here and now yeah so you and I'm probably misquoting this and fucking this up but I'm okay with it listen to the book and read the book because it's amazing but it basically says that you you cease to think about the future like obviously we all know that when we're drunk intuitively we understand that yeah but like if you ask someone about tomorrow like when they're 15 PSD they'll be like there is no tomorrow like that's like seriously the mindset exactly but that

is if like that's the effect of alcohol so yeah I think it's so crazy that people can get blackout drunk and I like I've done it we've all been there and you could make a decision that that impacts the rest of your life yeah absolutely in that position so when you if you do get to that point you better hope there's some people around you that are looking out for you and yeah and things like that because that's the biggest thing like people can change the whole cause of their life by something they do stupidly

when they're when they're intoxicated so yeah yeah I don't know it's a really interesting one don't get to that point if you do get into it do it in a safe environment yeah yeah seriously then eat a lot of food or take just like just eat three kebabs and go to sleep have you had a defining moment yeah I feel like I've had a lot of defining moments give me give me a top two okay one of one of the top ones I had it was back when I a couple of years ago I was

in a job working in a gym for sort of four or five years thought I'd be there forever I had sort of put all my heart and soul into that place and those people went on a three-month holiday and then came back and the day that I got back over the day after I got back I had a meeting with my bosses and they told me that they'd had a restructure they're making my position redundant and I could either step back into a lower position and sort of pick up shifts here and there yeah or

I could take a redundancy package yeah and the way they framed it was oh there was a lot of politics going on in the background yeah they they framed it as though I would never leave because they knew how loyal I was and how committed I was and how much work I was putting in so they never expected me to take the redundancy package yeah but in you know I'd sat on that and I took it home with me and and my big I call it a fuck it moment excuse the swearing no clown but

I the the courage that it actually took me to say no and to take the redundancy package because I knew I was worth more than that and to have that conversation with my bosses saying I've got my asses off for you guys and to come back from this to to this like I'm worth so much more than this I value myself more than this and to get to be able to say that and say I'm taking the redundancy package to no job like I was just pretty pretty empowering right yeah and I walked it I

was crying they were crying like it was a huge huge big thing but yeah I think it was the first time in my life that I've really stood up for what I believe I'm worth and that's that hasn't paid off so much like it's paid off so tenfold well thank you to them for making that fuck up yeah it's cool like it's cool how sliding door door moments like that happen right like if you if you decided that you know what morning since too far you would be living a whole different life right now like

I wouldn't have met you and I wouldn't have met a lot of the people that you've introduced me to that of becoming really important parts of my life so yeah that whole butterfly effect thing is kind of cool yeah this one's a little less deep this one what's favorite fun fact fun fact oh I got one for you I know any fun fact I learned a new one yesterday go what were you thinking of yours 1.5 million people died last year in the world from diabetes that's not a fun fact ready it's still a fact

all facts fun fit out of 56 million titles 56 million people died in the world last year or last year 2016 I'm probably cocking this up right here so 1.5 million from diabetes only 800,000 each died from human violence so twice as many people were killed by sugar than human violence and which one are we kind of kicking up the most stink about yeah not saying both aren't issues but I don't know I find that really interesting the way humans chase down an idea without necessarily looking at numbers like that yeah what's your thing boring

I know I've got nothing next one what advice would you give a younger 15 year old version of yourself back yourself in good back yourself in I fail fast yeah like stop procrastinating and you know if you're not happy and what you're doing change like you can change a whole life in basically an instant yeah like if you're not happy in your job quit and get another job like if if your house environment you're not happy and change it if your relationship you're not happy in change it if your friendship group you're not happy in

change it like and you know if you quit one job and go to the next and you know that's not it to keep moving keep moving yeah just like try things out fail because you learn from them and then you will find the thing that yeah is your thing I think that's a big one like it's you've got to find that balance between the like fuck it moments and I'm gonna keep working in this and you've got to figure out and I think all that all that comes from your your values and what your vision

is if you like your vision will change it's fluid and it's something that we talk about a lot of at the moment we're talking about a lot of the moment a vertice but if your vision is to help more people cool do things that serve that if your vision is to pay the bills make lots of money cool do something that serves that because as long as everything comes back to living up to your values and living up to your vision day in day out you sweet and you're probably gonna be fulfilled and happy yeah

and that was a big thing that I got from Matt Matt Church was he sat me down one time back when I was at winning and I was I was just so unhappy and trying so hard and just feeling like a failure every day and I was crying to him just being like I'm trying so hard and it's you know six or seven months later and I I'm still I still don't feel like I'm succeeding like I'm still not taking care of my health I'm still not training I'm still not hydrated I'm still stressed I'm

still you know I just can't seem to get it and he was just like is this is this job because your job is such a big part of your life is this feeding or taking away from your values so he sat down and nutted out you know what my values are because a lot of people don't think about what they value I like to ask for everyone listening write down your five values yeah write down what they are and why and and go is is what I'm doing now serving this like if it's you know

you're busting your ass through you need to get to somewhere that he's gonna serve it awesome it's serving it if you're working the job that you hate and it's not serving it like change something and I'm not naive to think that people don't have reasons like that they reasons or blocks or roadblocks to stop them from changing or if you're not happy with your health is it something that you can change because yes is gonna be struggle and there's gonna be hard times but remember growth is never pleasant mmm in like at the time so

go through those struggles and you end up like where you are and I'm happier and more fulfilled more content place yeah and now like I'm still finding it hard you know balancing three jobs isn't easy well gets it too soon but it's feeding my values so I'm in a much better place and it wasn't that I wasn't in a bad environment I was in a great environment it just wasn't feeding my values yeah I like it mmm little segue from that what is success to you success to me I think it's I think one part

of it is living completely true to myself and who I am as a person and not you know having to put on an act or I don't know having to pretend I'm something that I'm not I think if I'm you know really truly successful I can be myself and be honest and have the tough conversations with people sometimes if they're stepping over boundaries or I can you know have the conversations with people around me if they're dropping their own standards or I can accept criticism if I'm dropping my standards or you know I can I

can push myself to be better yeah I think successes is living true to yourself truly getting to a point where like as lame as it sounds like you actually truly love the person that you are which is a really hard thing to do yeah sometimes like to sit there and actually be like I'm really proud of myself and what I'm doing and who I am as a person because you just don't talk like that with people yeah like you don't have those conversations yeah but a lot of people do like it I'm starting to realize

that you can have those conversations and like we have this conversation sometimes like KP and I working on having those conversations more often you know with bunch of guys at work and bunch of clients and friends like I would start having those conversations because it's I don't know it's it's liberating I love it I really really enjoy talking about stuff that's hard yeah like it's it's the how are you doing yeah good thanks there like it's the yeah like that's what we're so used to yeah but get past that and go how are you doing

and then you end up like diving into each other's worlds and both come out feeling amazing and feeling like I can genuinely help people just by talking hmm and everyone we have here like all of us family are awesome like yeah policies awesome yeah that's a policy shadow to cats cats is awesome yeah like Mon everyone who comes in the doors is awesome yeah and they're awesome because they're like vulnerable they're vulnerable enough to or they're working on being vulnerable so they're vulnerable enough to go you know what I suck at this help I need

help I need to work through it yeah and that's something that that's why we do what we do in the day hmm what's your biggest struggle at the moment biggest struggle at the moment putting myself first which is a very consistent answer with most people that work to help other people hmm yeah why is it a struggle and what are the things what things are you doing to work through it so it's a struggle because I'm so I'm so caught up with well I have been so caught up with how everyone else around me is

and how I can help all the people around me and you know if my clients at boot camp are doing well or what sessions they're going to you know how how our team are going and if they're happy and my family or my friends or anyone around me because I just want to help people you just get caught up in that and you kind of can go through the motions and forget hang on I actually need to help myself because I'm helping trying to keep all these other people accountable to their goals who's I need

a key to my goals and take care of myself and my health and we've kind of cut like talking about it a lot like we've kind of coined it just a two-way accountability right like I want someone keeping me accountable for the stuff that I need that I say I'll do and the stuff I need to do and yeah things like that and like you're good at that KP is good at that different people in my life are good at that but at the end of the day it's on me so I've got to keep

myself accountable but at the same time other people keep me kind of helps so it's like yeah it's that like that teamwork that chain analogy that we're talking about in the meeting today shouts coach camp for that it's you know if you like if I fuck up my accountability and you give me a kick out the bum say look after yourself then when you do it when you stuff up and we like just you should be drinking your water because that bottle looks awfully full right now and it's little things like that so you know

and it doesn't always have to be someone who's just a friend because or a friend or family because they've all everyone's got their own shit going on like investing in things like coaching and accountability stuff and like go see a dietitian go you know go see a performance coach you know go talk to a psych or a doctor or something like that because that's you filling your cup that's you putting back into you that's you looking after yourself and actually allowing yourself to ask for help which is the biggest thing which is yeah that's just

us help because everyone I'm a big believer that everyone wants to help you've just got to find the right person people at the right time who want to help and who are able to help yeah 100% and like having having an external coach like obviously we believe in it because we're coaches so yeah we believe in the service yeah but having that if you're constantly stuffing it up and like I've done this recently I've enlisted in coaches to help me because it got to the point where you know my housemate asked me when I was

training the other day like and it was the one question that really hit me and it was are you happy with where you're at with your training right now so if there's an area in your life where if someone sits there and asks you are you happy with your financial situation or are you happy with your social life or are you happy with your health or your you know nutrition or training or whatever it is and the answer is no and it's something that's really important to you or if if it's one of your biggest

values like I sat there and he asked me that and for the last two years I haven't been happy with my health and fitness and that's not it's not just a month has gone by yeah two years is a long time yeah it's a big big chunk of your life yeah so I was like stuff it I'm gonna go pay someone to help me with this because yes I know all the things but I'm currently not doing all the things yeah so hire someone to help you do it like I ask for help yeah people

want to help yeah definition of insanity is on the same sheet over and over again expecting different results so if not having a coach for 12 months hasn't worked cool enlist the help of a coach yeah and you know like we're not just saying it because we because we want people to hire us as coaches yes go anywhere but like I enlisted the help of my allies like I hi-cam hi-cam to be my coach yes I haven't been seeing as much as I would have liked but that's it that's it I'm aware of that decision

now I'll see him tomorrow but I've hired great to help me with my rehab footy and just and just make sure that my body's gonna be resilient enough to get through the footy season so when you and like you know I was added to be my yoga instructor like I enlist you to keep me accountable and work stuff like I'm not an island and I don't want to be an island I want to I want to have people helping me all the time and hmm everyone wants to help that's the best bit like all you

got to do is ask and as soon as you ask people feel empowered because they want to help you and then you know everyone wins it's a beautiful magical symbiotic environment where everyone's working for each other I am a cool coaching seminar I guess the other week and the guy who was running it dropped a really cool knowledge bomb that was you know there's there's no book of Oprah Winfrey that she's written with her like on the front being like how I did it all by myself yeah no successful person who's written a book about

how they became successful or how they're winning at life or how they've achieved you know going into space or creating the light bulb or like whatever it is in history yeah not one single person is being like yes how I did it all alone yeah yeah it's all how I did it with the help of my team yeah with the help of my community and family yeah yeah and the the more the be a family can become the more people you can ask for help yeah and I found that with like I think you know

only knowing you for a year made me realize that most a lot of the people most a lot of the people in my life that are making the biggest impact to my growth day to day are people that didn't know a year ago hmm it's kind of cool that's a cool thing to think about that in 12 months I might have pissed you guys off and found a whole new bunch of people it's cool because like especially with coaches or with people who are holding you accountable or you know trying to help you to get

to that next level they don't they're not the people who keep you comfortable yeah they're not the people who tell you what you want to hear all the time they're the people who have the hard conversation with you and tell you you're dropping your standards like what you're doing and these uses of coming up with yeah a bullshit and they're holding you back and you're holding yourself back well that's what like it's hard to hear so like Mitch said the other day like that to me he just kind of says like our standards need a

lift where we are not living up to the standards we set and like if I wish I was as mature and and like I respect him so much for this his ability to look at bigger picture like he's 21 and he's probably one of the most mature people of it it's like his ability to look at the bigger picture and say this isn't good enough we need to be better he's awesome yeah and like as soon as you can go this isn't what I said I would do and this is what isn't what we said

we would do then the whole standard lifts because everyone is aware of it and that's what having a coach allows you to do yeah yeah and you might hate them in that moment go home a because I'm hearing that is hard in that moment but then afterwards get your past your suck point yeah and a hundred percent you're like thank you yeah because I needed to hear that even though I hated you right yeah it's like fuck you but you're right like yeah that's the reaction yeah and that's why like learning to embrace negative feedback

in so many different things it's just incredible hmm all right we wrap this up if you could be remembered in one sentence what would it be this is hard yeah yeah what do you say I didn't say to be easy oh that's really good one someone who made the world a better place and had fun doing it just think amongst yourselves at home haha I think I want to leave people better off after me being there cool so if I have a conversation with someone I want them to leave that conversation better that is good

because it's not happier it's not like more comfortable it's better hmm yeah it doesn't need to be better in that moment but after good who are the three people you look up to and why three people I look up to and why number one Matt Church what a man another shout out he's why he's done so much for me and my mindset to go like six six months ago we were having a conversation and we had a lot of tough conversations but him I was I was just in a negative place and he gave me

like a 20-minute rant on how how much I pissed him off and he was he really meant it and it was because I couldn't see how good I was I wasn't taking care of myself and I wasn't loving myself and I wasn't living up to my potential at that point in time and he sat me down for 20 minutes and told me how much that pissed him off because he could see how awesome I was but I couldn't see it so the fact that he and I was like crying but the fact that he could

you know call me out on that and say that in a really caring way to get me to realize I'm actually awesome like I'm actually a really cool person yeah I think I remember you coming into vertice maybe the day after maybe the day of that chat hmm and like you usually bounce off the walls but you're probably bouncing off the walls yeah it was ace and it was hard because like you know he asked me the question well I can't even remember what it was now it was something like what ha what do you

like about yourself yeah or that was a question yeah I think of what yeah I remember you saying that and I had nothing I literally had nothing to say I mean that point like it sounds so stupid now yeah yeah had nothing and I came up with like I've got good taste in music and sometimes I'm funny that was the only good things that I could think about for myself so to get from there to him sort of helping me realize how cool I am it's really cool so yeah he's helped me with a lot

of self-worth self-love stuff good which is really cool so I really look up to him if anyone hasn't listened to the podcast with Matt Church it's a few podcasts ago or it's maybe 30 something yeah it's it's amazing and I'll definitely getting back on at some point and we'll hit a couple of topics we try we kind of dance around and hit a bunch of different stuff I want to nail down a few of the most important things at some point two more two more two more and then I'll ask you for one more thing

and then we'll wrap it up yeah another one Geordie who runs the boot camp that I'm working at he is a phenomenal human and he's his ability to bring out the best in people and to not accept people's stories is incredible yeah like that and his ability to be that solid constant consistent support to everyone around him while still you know letting them stuff up letting them make mistakes and still being there as that support and never getting frustrated and all of that I really look up to his ability to stay so grounded and yeah

he's no legend wanting to improve their health and fitness industry as it is he's another massive one yeah I'm not just saying that because you're sitting here right in front of me but but I can quit yeah yeah like the help and support and in environment you've created and continue to create and develop and to make better is incredible like what what we're all doing here as a team yes it is a team it's all started from you and you continuously drive it and like put in the work and effort and you know read all

these books to develop yourself even more so that you can be better so that we can all be better so that all of our clients can be better it's awesome it's really cool you're welcome thank you mmm last one actually last two favorite quote there's a lot it still just comes back to how we do one thing is how we do everything you tell ya now last one tell me a joke I know tell me a joke babe tell me a joke you haven't done your job properly you need to train me up I'm sure

you got one by a joke I'm pathetic I've got nothing what was Greg stroke when he came and walked in I'm gonna steal people's job silly Wow and on that note with the great disappointment Jess thank you very much for coming on the podcast you